Saturday, January 21, 2012

A Year Behind Us and So Much Ahead

This is another personal blog rather than work blog. Today marks the day, one year ago, that my husband Glenn and I went on our very first date. A year ago, I would have never expected the chain of events that took place following that date and especially the time table. Prior to dating Glenn I usually took my relationships by the horns and tried to manipulate them to be what I wanted. When I heard God saying "No," I chose to ignore Him and move forward because I didn't want to miss MY opportunity at love. It saddens me a lot because I did a lot of damage to myself and to those I was in a relationship with simply because I wasn't patient. However, I am SO thankful that God doesn't give up on us when we make a mess of ourselves. He loves us enough to pick us up out of the miry pit and set our feet on solid ground. However, it's almost always when we let go of the control and let HIM do HIS thing....which is always the best way. (Some of us stubborn ones have to learn the hard way.)

So Glenn and I were just friends and I was volunteering at the mission. I was actually dating someone when I met him so I didn't even think anything of him as other than a co-worker.  But once I was single, Glenn asked me out within the week. The night of our date, I was working at Lifeway Christian Bookstore.  I got off of work and had to change in the bathroom there because I was going to meet Glenn right afterwards.  I was oddly comfortable with him, but still remember my heart pounding out of my chest because it was "new." We ate dinner at Mellow Mushroom. Walking to and from the car he INSISTED on walking on the outside of the sidewalk. I had never experienced this before. I was kind of like, "huh?" (To this day, I can't remember a time that I've walked on the outside, unless it was just to pick at him.) The sky was clear. The moon was bright. The stars were out. Glenn said, "Let's go sit on the beach." Now I LOVE the beach. But let me mention it was January and FREEZING. However...that did not stop us. We drove out to Tybee Beach, got all bundled up and sat on one of the swings on the beach. Just as we sat down and looked up to admire the night sky, the clouds rolled in. We couldn't see ANYTHING! We laughed about it but continued to sit an talk for HOURS. It was one of the easiest conversations I've ever had. And it wasn't just surface stuff. We really shared our hearts..the past, present, and future. It was that kind of feeling when you know that it isn't coincidence that you have so much in common. I could see from that moment how God was already lining up our future and it wasn't just because I wanted it. God was at work. We snapped this picture before getting back in the car. It captures pure joy. (although my face was covered, my smile was huge, both on my face and on my heart.)

When I dropped him off, he got out of the car, gave me a hug a kiss on the cheek. He said, "I had a really great time. I'd love to do this again sometime." We were pretty much attached from that point on. It was like we courted from the very beginning. Everything was with purpose headed towards marriage. We attended marriage conferences and counseling from the first few weeks of being together. Some people would think that was crazy, but for us, we both knew how to do relationships the wrong way and we wanted to do it right. God was THE focus of our relationship from day one. I know it sounds cliche' and we definitely had our "moments" but for the most part...it was EASY. It was ENJOYABLE. We didn't spend our time defining what we were, or try to pick apart the other person's thoughts. We laughed, we spent time with family, we served together, we worshiped together. We had fun. And after trying to force relationships to go my way for my entire life, it actually felt like a huge deep breath. So THIS is what God meant about being equally yoked. So it DOES make a difference to have one purpose.  So it IS WORTH WAITING for the person God has for you. I wish I could have saved myself and others the heartache of trying to do it my way. I wish I would have spent that time just focusing on being the woman God was preparing me to be. I am thankful for the experiences of love and loss along the way. Each person taught me something and blessed me in some way, I'm thankful God made good of it all, but Oh to know then what I know now.  We don't have the perfect marriage. Honestly, who does? BUT....we have a purposeful marriage. I am continually challenged to be a better woman because my husband is continually striving to be a better man. I am humbled by the love he has for me. There is not a single day of our marriage so far that he has not told me he loves me and that I'm beautiful.  I don't say all of this to brag or rub it in. Here is the reason I type this for the world to see.

#1. This is part of the anniversary gift to my husband. Glenn, I want you to know that I am HONORED to be your wife. I am honored to carry your name. I am honored that you are blessed and spoken highly of in the community of people we know. It is a privilege to run the race by your side and it is easy to submit to you because you are trustworthy. I hope that if the Lord blesses us with children someday, that they will read this about their father and know he loved their mother. I know you will leave a legacy that will make God famous in your life.

#2. Because there are so many young girls, teens, women out there who either feel like their day will never come, or feel like it may have already come and gone. Sweet daughter of Christ, YOU are WORTH the WAIT. And a man does NOT define your worth. So much easier said than done. I realize that many of us don't feel like we are worth the wait so we try to "Make" our fairytale come true, only to end up jaded, hurt, or miserable because it was not the fairytale that THE author wrote. The Author (God) is the one who created the characters (us) with their personalities, quirks, and all. And HE knows all the story ends. Instead we treat our life like one of those alternate ending books deciding how the story ends. If you've ever read one of those books, you know that there is always one ending that is better than the rest. Let your life be that ending. Let it be the best because God is in it. It doesn't mean that it turns out perfectly or that it doesn't come without trials or pain, but you can take a deep breath because you know that if you're where God wants you, He's got you....no matter what. Please wait for the man who KNOWS you are a gift. It makes a difference. And if a man left you.....he does NOT know your worth. Don't spend your days living in the bondage of someone who did NOT carry out the biblical commands to "LOVE" his wife as Christ loved the church.
You are first and foremost the BRIDE of CHRIST....and no man on this earth will live up to Him. Hopefully they will REFLECT Him.

My "Fairytale" that I thought could never happen was there all along, God was just waiting for me to hand over the pen.

So....here's to a great and memorable first year. I can't wait for what the next year holds.
Thanks Glenn, for always striving to make me smile, making me laugh, and reminding me that my worth is in Christ.



 For His Renown,
Morgan

1 comment:

  1. Okay, so I'm just going to start adding this to my morning reading so that I don't read a month's worth of posts at one time and respond to things long since out of your mind...ha.

    First, I couldn't be happier for the both of you, or prouder that you guys have been good to one another from the start. It's a testament to who you are as individuals, of course, so kudos to both of you for being remarkable individuals and becoming a remarkable couple.

    Second, right after your wedding I took Ginny home, and we discussed this very issue -- of the importance of relinquishing control and the way things seem to come together when we do. Until this summer I ALWAYS tried to be the glue that held every relationship together -- relationship or friendship. And then, when I finally realized the futility of that, I found myself blessed beyond measure.

    Thanks for reminding me again -- today I needed it. :)

    Hugs,
    M

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